First Crush...
No, this is not a story about regret, more like a "what if..?" story.
Sandra was the prettiest girl in the 7th grade class. She had a smile that always left a lot of guys with dopey smiles on their faces and I was one of them. I had intentionally lost a bet in order to "have to" carry her books to all her classes. After a while most guys thought we were "boyfriend/girlfriend" and of course I never did anything to clear up their mistake.
It wasn't until near the end of the semester that I finally told her how I felt about her. Unfortunately, my family moved away after school let out that summer. We tried to keep in touch, even managed to visit a few times... The last time we spoke to each other was when she told me her family was planning on moving. She promised to let me know her new address when she found out. Every once in a while I wonder how her life turned out.

Song of the Day: "Caught Up In You" by 38 Special

Marriage lessons from Men who should know
Here are some words of wisdom from some "friends" who ARE THERE and DOING THAT.

"Find someone you can stand."
"Go with your first instinct."
"Kids are great for cheap labor"
"Do you really want to?"
"Bozos, they're such bozos."
"Eh, just let loose in the mall, that'll keep 'em busy for a while."
"You want to eat?"
"That's alright, they bounce."

Ok, so I made up some of them, but which ones are the ones I didn't make up?

Song of the Day: "You Look Wonderful Tonight" by Eric Clapton

No Take Backs
A person sneezed in the library. Now it wasn't one of those "hold it in and hope you don't make too much noise because you are in the library" type sneeze. This person really let it rip! It startled quite a few people and it got a couple of giggles from a group of girls nearby. As loud a blast as it was, it only solicited one "bless you", just one. After a few seconds, the person who gave the blessing got mad because the person who sneezed did not respond to the blessing. In a matter of seconds, the blessing was taken back and replaced with one of those overtly sarcastic comments, "Fine! Don't say thank you!" designed to provoke an apology from the "ungreatful" nose honker.
Can people do that? Take back a blessing because they were not thanked for giving it? What's the reason for wishing people well? Do people keep track of the "good" things they do expecting some sort of payback? Some kind of "I did for you" so "You do for me" tally sheet?
In the end if the blesser had stuck around a little longer, she might have seen two people go up to the "sneezer" signing hello.

Song of the Day: "Games People Play" by The Alan Parsons Project

Hey You're that guy!
I guess my anonymity as far as the World Wide Web is concerned is intact, somewhat. I've heard stories of people finding so much information about themselves just by entering their names in various search engines. The amount of information about themselves on the internet scared them. It got me thinking, "How much information is out there of me?" Using Yahoo, I am entry numbers 1, 2 ans 18. Using Google, I am entry numbers 3, 24 and 46. Using MSN, I only show up once at number 13. Of all the entries, the one that shows up first was from a friend's guestbook that I "signed" back in 1997. The others are work related, more like online directories. whew...

---

I was reading some haikus this afternoon. I thought they were very good, actually inspiring. Whether or not that can be considered a good thing I can't tell. But I am sure that the few people who do read this (all 3 of them can and will tell me if it was a good thing or not, because I am inspired to try to write... um... some. I had a problem focusing on what to write on so I left it up to Natalie. Without telling her what it was for, I asked her to give me a single word. I would then use that word as the subject of the haikus I am going to try to create.

STRAWBERRIES
Strawberrie teazers
Traci gets it at Guppy's
Who wants one, I'll buy.

Spelled here the wrong way
But Traci spells it this way
So sez Natalie.

Milkshake or smoothie
shortcake or pie, it's all good
even jam on toast.

Song of the Day: "The Way" by Fastball

Pencil It In
Looking through my schedule for this week, I realized that I have a good amount of spare time. What am I going to do with myself? I know one thing I am going to be doing is going to the gym, actually trying the make going to the gym part of the week's regimen. As I've mentioned in an earlier post, I haven't been in a gym for quite a while and I haven't been on a regular exercise schedule since my last open heart (May 2001). I also want to catch up on some movie watching. I was reading the list of nomination for the Academy Awards, as it turns out I've only seen a total of 2 of ALL the movies nominated. I don't know whether or not to be ashamed or proud. Anyway, I think I will take time to watch at least 2 of the nominated movies this week, now which ones?

---

Memory: Pogo Stick! How cool were they? I used to be pretty good on those things.




Song of the Day: "Why Can't I" by Liz Phair

I woke up late this morning, so I was in a bit of a rush going to work. Not so much a mad dog sort of rush but not the leisurely pace that I usually take. I had just left my street and getting ready to turn into one of the major roads when I saw a man walking his dogs. Normally, a person walking their dogs would not get so much attention from me but this guy was at least 6-4 and about 200+ lbs and yes the dogs were weiner dogs. I just HAD to stop and smile and the day didn't seem as rushed anymore. I love it when God taps me on the shoulder like that.

Song of the Day: "Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head" by B.J. Thomas

I was flipping through the channels and the Golden Globe is on. I guess it has been on for a while now. Jennifer Lopez was presenting an award and she doesn't look as "all that" right now. She looks very well put together but I guess the break up is taking a little toll. The Lord of the Rings won a few things what they were for I didn't catch but it won something....
Flipping throught the channels again and now we're at the WE channel. I guess it is a channel geared for women. A show is following a bunch of women going through their day/night. One is about a model (Shawna?) shopping for a Gala event she is going to that night. Another set they are following are two girls "rich man hunting" in Las Vegas, they are really hitting on the "golddigger" angle. I think it is time to move on....
Hey! Zorro is showing on TNT. The Antonio Banderas one. It seemed like it was Antonio Banderas night the other night. Surfing around the other night it seemed like he was on every channel. Zorro, The 13th Warrior and the one with Stallone, can't think of the title. Next....
Cool! I didn't know the Teen Titans have a cartoon out. There's Robin, Cyborg and ... I don't recognize the others. I used to read the comic book.
Is Jessica Simpson one of the dumbest human beings in America? Or is she faking? I mean she is talented there's no argument there but is that all there is to her?
Ok, back to the Golde Globe... wow! Charlize Theron looks amazing. I've never really took a good look. If this is how she comes across the majority of the time i can see how she is popular.

Song of the Day: "The Remedy" by Jason Mraz

Started my workout this morning at Bally's. I was a bit nervous and lost. It has been a while since the last time I was in a gym, I really did not know where to start. I thought I would take it easy the first time around, so I stayed away from the more complicated "torture devices" and stuck to using the track and the cycle machines. I ended up walking for 20 minutes around the track, another 20 on the cycles then finally another 20 on the track to loosen up. I thought I had better stop there, still have images of passing out when I over did it in a gym. I was wiped, but a good kind of wiped. Overall, I was left with the "hmmm... that wasn't bad, I think I'll do it again." If I can get enough of these kind of workouts it might actually become a regular routine. Let's hope.

---

Memory: I remember when my first pet died. He was a greyhound I called hotdog. There had been a lot of trouble with stray dogs roaming the streets of Guam so the city decided to poison the trash cans before pick ups. Hotdog got loose the night before pick up and the neighbors found him. I remember running down the street crying. My first lesson on death, I was 8 years old.

Song of the Day: "The Way You Move" by Outkast

[kahit na ano]

There I finally got it done and sent everyone who worked on it at work a copy. They may not like the ending but hey where were they? I really shouldn't say that I was the one that didn't work today.

No work today, only help is from the TV,
nothing is showing but an old movie.
The gang’s mood at work is a little heavy
but they’ll see this first and that’s groovy.

A big hint is this stanza for “W”
‘cause there are no words that sound like “W”.
The only thing I can think of for “W”
is the matador’s last words, “The Bull…you…”

I should have thought more of this challenge’s vortex
it placed a strain on everyone’s cerebral cortex.
In truth except for a few the rules were not complex
just hard for letters like W, J, H but not “X”.

For some reason this last makes me think of Kauai
actually everyone should know the reason why.
I’m actually thinking of going the Hawaii
ok, I’m cheating … why, why, why?

The end is finally here and I’m getting dizzy
from all everybody shouting, my ear is buzzy.
I rockin’ and a reelin’ as if I were boozy
I hope I don’t get sick from being a little woozy.


Star Sighting:

I went to the "On Air with Ryan Seacrest" studios at the Hollywood Highland Complex in Hollywood today. My sister had business with some people from the show and asked me if I wanted to come along. I thought we were just going to meet for lunch. As it turns out I got to see Dick Clark, Sheryl Crow and Kelly Osbourne. They were guests on the show and we were "hanging out" in the Green Room. I didn't get to talk to Dick Clark and it was only "hello" with Sheryl Crow, but Kelly Osbourne was not a busy or didn't have (or need) an entourage as a buffer zone around her, she took the time to have a picture taken with my sister. Until this afternoon I never even heard of the show, they had their studio built on the Highland side of the complex and the studio has a nice "trl"- like view of Highland Boulevard north of Hollywood Boulevard.
They had set up a stage in the center of the open area of the complex for Sheryl Crow and her band to perform. She sang a couple of songs and it was very nice. There were people there who knew about the performance from the show's website, others were surprised by the whole set up. I was next to a couple who were part of a tour group from ... well... somewhere else and they were really excited that it was Sheryl Crow performing. They were saying how fortunate it was that they decided to take this particular tour instead of going to Disneyland. I just love to hear what if stories.

---

Memory: Going back to my Guam days again. We had a neighbor three doors down whose hobby was (for all I know still is) fishes. He had all kinds of fishes. I remember that every once in a while the kids in the neighborhood would go over to his house to check out the fish of the week or the aquarium of the month. But what I remember most was helping him build a pond in his backyard. He had actually asked my dad for help because he needed cement and other materials that my dad already had plus the tools like a cement mixer and other cool stuff I used to get in trouble playing around with them. It turned out pretty cool after a month all the plants and fishes he put in it were coming along great.

Song of the Day: "(There's Gotta Be) More To Life" by Stacie Orrico

[kahit na ano]

So it is coming to an end, at least to some kind of end. This time around more people were involved.


Came to work early to start a new salvo
at this new obsession making everyone wacko.
Trying to get a handle on it, ‘cuz it’s gonna grow
Where’s my rope, my lariat, my lass-o.

Ok, that last one was a little bit bumpy
the words used were very dopey.
Its got to get better for me to be happy
because to do a bad job is just plain crappy.

Coming in to help Alex shows as if on queue
shouting “I want to help!” like it was a rescue.
“I wasn’t here for the start of this literary barbeque,”
“I can help, I have above average I.Q.”

Now this situation is really getting bizarre
people are hearing about this from near and far.
I have to keep the door closed, not open or ajar
maybe even secure it with a lock or a bar.

So putting this “thing” on my website for all to access
might give meaning to all this “goofing off” excess.
But for all the time spent, I really must confess,
the people who took part relieved a lot of stress.

So the drunken and idiotic wordsmith party
continues with their shameless poetic sortie.
Knowing that in this torturous endeavor, they’re guilty
of ruining the sublime, the splendor, the beauty.

There was a problem downstairs so we changed ven-ue,
carrying this manuscript like a treasure of great value.
We picked up another voice in John’s nephew
and headed back up after solving the administrative issue.


I've showed this to a few people already but not one has figured out its theme yet. I wonder if it is only because I started it that its theme is so obvious.

---

Memory: My father had a construction company back in the 70s. I remember one day a truck dumped a huge mound of sand in our backyard for a big job at our house. The mound got as high as the roof of the house. After the truck and the workers left, all the neighborhood kids came over and we had the biggest game of King of the Mountain any of us had ever had.

Song of the Day: "Hold On" by Good Charlotte

[kahit na ano]

I can't believe I am spending so much time on this thing. Got a few people from work involved and it is becoming too much of a diversion. Anyone getting any work done? I don't think so...heh, heh, heh...


The students’ minds started at 100 MPH,
So they can put in their lab MMH.
This is weird due to their ATH,
I have to keep an eye on them until I am SAH.

This thing took shape in my mind to try
It’s a frivolous venture at best, that I can’t den-y.
But moral was down, at least in my eye
So it has lifted some spirits and that I will buy.

I recalled a show, whose lead was called B.J.
and another with a crime fighting D.J.
Whatever happened to the original MTV V.J.?
You know the curly haired, deep voiced J.J.


The hallway is now a sweet smelling bouquet
The mess has been mopped from the parquet.
Disinfectant were sprayed to wash away the decay
And yes, once cleaned it was again OK.

ARGHHH! At my computer I would yell,
because the operating system, again fell.
I’m looking around for an escape from this cell
And get away from this nightmare from Dell.

These girls walked by wearing only a hem
I was thinking, “ewwww, shame on them!”
Their criteria for fashion require an “A-hem,”
to walk all around showing all of their femme.

The boss is gone, so we begin again
we all go back to the writing bullpen.
We numbered two, now we’re ten,
all working hard like word bending madmen.


I really should do something today. One more verse? Nah! Gotta do some work... hmmm, now where did I put that putter of mine?

Song of the Day: "China Girl" by David Bowie

[kahit na ano]

Hey here is a thing... It started because I was bored out of my head and before I knew it, I was hooked. I couldn't stop it if I wanted to and ... here it comes... I DON'T WANT TO!!!!


The "what is this" poem of the day
started from the boredom clay.
To choose between work or play
what do you think? hip hip hooray!

Thinking how long this should be
more joined in to help this baby.
From next door came a-many busy bee
to help with this poetic Moby.

By the third group we can see
that this monster won't be easy.
We go full on not like a sissy
but the boss is coming so everyone look busy.

The staff was very handy
in adding all the word candy,
but we all got excited and giddy
when the last line was finished by Mindy.

I am not an Ice Cube or an Eazy E
just a word bending turk-ey.
It's harder and I'm getting ants-y
what's that smell? Phooooo-ey!

"The sewers backed up" says Jeff
and flooding the hall to the left.
Stuff came out of the fountain bereft
of clean water 'cause maintenance was deaf.

People stepping on the mess yelled "GEE!!"
They searched for a walking strategy.
The liquid was cloudy and dingy
the odor, a bad smell orgy.


To be continued...
I can't believe I got this far with this "What is this" Poem.

Song of the Day: "Hey Ya" by Outkast

[kahit na ano]

Here is another written long ago...

ROLES

In this world of friends and lovers
fate has given me my part,
to many hands in friendship
but never to win a heart.

Brother, pal, friend, pare.
These titles I'll proudly keep,
behind a tree, as lovers stroll by
alone, I shall weep.

But as each new adventure unfolds
I try to break from the past.
To shake the role of the longtime friend
and to be the lover at last!

These delusions, these fantasies, will never be
I know well the reasons why,
This movie, this show will last my lifetime
My part is mine 'til I die.

These words etched in my mind
as if cast upon stone.
It shall be my epitaph
that I "Died alone".


Obviously, I was not exactly cheery when I wrote this. Anyone can only guess what happened to put in such a state of mind. Every now and again the thought creeps in and I know that I have to fight it. I have to, the alternative is to give up.

[kahit na ano]

OK, I went to the Drive in last night. My sleeptime management operations center tells me I shouldn't go, but my "I wanna go out" center cleared all arguments with the "what the heck you're not working tomorrow" argument. So I went...

Cheaper By the Dozen: It was funny without being "Steve Martin crazy" funny.

Chasing Liberty: Not really the kind of movie I would go watch. It had a Disney movie feel to it. Feel good movie.

Along Came Polly: RUN!! RUN AWAY!! The Lais, Wongs and Soohoos promised me we weren't going to be watching a scary movie, but they didn't tell me we weren't going to watch a painful one! After the movie we pretty much unanimously gave it a collective "UGH!"

Now, I know why I don't get to the theater much. The movies aren't that good. But it was great hanging out with the families.

Song of the Day: "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" by U2

[kahit na ano]

Teaching Sunday school has been a lot of fun this quarter. There are a lot more discussion in the class. The curriculum is simpler but involves more input from the kids. It still needs some work, there are times when we go off on a tangent and it takes a while to get back on track. But it's coming along.
Afterwards, we got a big group to go to Superbowl for Vietnamese food for lunch. All together, there was almost 30 of us there. It is always a lot of fun when a crowd of us go to lunch after service. We say it's all about the food, but I think it's the fellowship. Because it doesn't matter if it's at McDonald's, Superbowl, Chili's or Guppy's, it always ends up a lot of fun.
The families (Lai, Lai, Soohoo and Wong) invited me to go with them to the Drive in tonight. It sounds like fun but I haven't had a lot of sleep the past few days. Should I go? Maybe a nap....

Song of the Day: "I'm Your Puppet" by Marvin Gaye

[kahit na ano]

When it comes to music, I am an accomplished listener. Well... maybe not that accomplished but I really enjoy listening to music. It really doesn't matter what kind, jazz, blues, rock, r & b, even pop. I went out last night to listen to some blues being played at a club in Santa Monica called Harvelle's. The band playing was called Carlos Guitarlos. I don't know if that was the name of the leader of the band, the band itself or a combination of the two but they had a female singer that could really sing the blues. It was soulful, gritty and highly charged all at once.

[kahit na ano]

I was asked recently what was behind my love for motorcycling. Without hesitation I went into the following story:

When I was about 7 years old, growing up in Guam, I was told to only ride my bike on my street, up and down the block, 30 yards of street and I was ok with that. I didn't want to know what was on the other block, besides I wasn't too confident of my bike riding abilities as much as the other kids in the neighborhood. One day some of the kids wanted to go to this house that sold popsicles on the other block. I asked my mom and to my utter surprise she said to go ahead and gave me a dollar to buy popsicles for everybody (they were 10 cents each back then). WOW! there were 8 of us and we tore out of the block pretending we were in a great race. We were heading towards an adventure, danger, excitement. I was on the way to do battle with robots. I was Big Bear of the Forever People (anyone know that reference?). We were a gang.
I felt so excited, I was exhilarated, I was so free! Never mind that it was just 2 block away, never mind that I was with 7 other kids from my street. I was riding in a straight line, I was weaving around, I was lazily riding around in circles. It was such a big thing for me and I had always equated that feeling with two wheels.

So, bikes? Pedal power or motor, it's always good. Accidents and all, pass the band-aids.

Song of the Day: "My Love is like ... Wo" by My'a

[kahit na ano]

Trying to finish up a few things before tonight's gathering. It's Pastor Donald's last night in town so we have a little get together at the Derrick and Kathy's.

Mental flashes, Synapses firing!!
- The pearl is in the river.
- Turtles named Cuff and Link.
- Not in our town.
- ...until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.
- When you find yourself in danger,
When you’re threatened by a stranger,
When it looks like you will take a lickin’,
There is someone waiting,
Who will hurry up and rescue you,
Just call for __________ !

If you can tell me the references to all the above, you get a CD compilation of December's Songs of the Day.

Now off to the Lai's!!

Song of the Day: "Badaboom" by B2K

[kahit na ano]

It's late or early, depending on how you look at it. Got back from Guppy's about 45 minutes ago and I can't sleep. I had just finished reading Valis by Philip K. Dick. It is the first of a trilogy by this author. I don't think I will be reading the last two books of the series. It was hard to finish this book, there were times where I debated whether or not to finish the book. Basically, I forced myself to finish the book and now that I am done for one reason or another I feel the need to take a bath. I really find it odd that a book can have such an effect. One part of the book that I did find interesting was a theory the narrator had about people's mental stability. "...that for each person there is a sentence - a series of words - which has the power to destroy him." Though there is also another set of words that has the power to heal that person. The thing is he goes on to say that IF a person is lucky enough that person will get the second, but they will most certainly get the first. Without any training, people know how to deal out the lethal sentence, but training is required to deal out the second, the healing sentence.
How fragile is the IS the human psyche? How big a crisis do people have to go through to have a "meltdown"? I doubt very much that the silver bullet to a person's mental stability can be a set of words so much as to what the words represented (like bad news). From the viewpoint of mental health, I guess it would take a lot of training to deal out the healing sentence. Ugh! What time is it?
Haven't got a Song of the Day yet, maybe later after a little sleep....

[kahit na ano]

I was thinking back to the just before I started this "blog", this journal of sorts and I had a hard time trying to figure out what the title of the blog should be. I had a bunch that I thought were sort of clever...

Blah, bla-blah, blah, blah...
Moments of lucidity
Did I say that out loud?
No really...
A duck walks into a bar...
Take 2

Then I thought how about something that would say more about me and give a hint of what I was about...

Angel's Buffet
Caffeine induced ramblings
This is the coffee talking

I finally ended up with Kahit na ano which means Whatever in Tagalog. I figured I didn't really know what I was going to be writing in this blog. It could be all about experiences, thoughts, friends or "whatever". That's when it hit me, but Whatever didn't seem enough. I was talking to my sister about the idea of starting a blog and trying to figure out a title and she suggested that the title be in Tagalog. So here we are...

Song of the Day: "If You Wanna Be Happy" by Jimmy Soul

[kahit na ano]

Today's sources of stress that shouldn't be:

- rude drivers
- rude people
- Blue screens of death (if you don't know what that is consider yourself one of the few lucky ones)
- Office politics
-

Relievers of above stress:

- Traffic report from the 91 freeway from Bob
- Talking to the ONE
- Flag bringing me my slippers when I got home (ok, maybe that was more of a fantasy)
- The West Wing
- Some friends from church.






Song of the Day: "No More Kings" by Schoolhouse Rock

[kahit na ano]

What are some of the things that people will not leave the house without? There are some things that are seasonal like scarves, hats and gloves, they don't count. What are the things you need to have, the things you want to have when you leave the house?
I was thinking of my list and here it is:
- Driver's license (I usually drive within the traffic laws, but you never know.)
- Credit card, ATM card and/or cash (without them what's the point of going out?)
- keys (where am I going and how?)
- cellphone (in case I forget any of the above)
- my tiny notebook (I need some place to write down the flashes of ideas and thoughts that usually blind the part of my brain that controls common sense and functionality)
- a pen (see above)
- something to read (you never know when you spot the perfect tree to read under)

There it is... my list. What's in yours?

Song of the Day: "Walked Outta Heaven" by Jagged Edge

[kahit na ano]

First day back to work after a lengthy holiday break. After the day was through, I caught myself looking forward to the weekend and looking at the calendar to see when the next break would be... it's only Monday? yeeeesh!
I told myself that this year I would get more of the "right" kind of sleep. I know, how can there be a "right kind" of sleep if there's no wrong kind of sleep (all sleep is good)? Well, there is a right kind. That's the kind of sleep where you get enough for the coming day and you wake up all refreshed and not rushed. The wrong kind is the type where you try to catch up on the sleep you did not get enough of the night before. The way I see it a mad rush in the morning cancels out all or most of the potentially good sleep the night before (real scientific huh?).
So, I try to schedule an earlier "go to sleep" time, instead of wasting time watching TV or playing on the computer. What time is it?

Song of the Day: " Night Moves" by Bob Seger

[kahit na ano]

Had a pretty full day. Pastor Donald gave the message this morning so I had the class sit in for the message instead of going into the classroom. There were a lot of visitors as Pastor Donald was speaking and that we were holding Child Dedications. Derrick and Kathy had arranged for dinner at one of Donald's favorite restaurants, Tokyo Lobby. There was a pretty good turn out. Some of us cooked up a little joke. After Donald talked to Joan in Chicago, telling her he was having dinner with some people, a few of us took turns calling her asking her for Donald's cel phone number as we were all waiting for him at the restaurant and he hasn't arrived yet... we're a bunch of dorks.
As we were eating, Grace made a comment on how the kids get along so well with each other. Looking at the tables where the kids were the older kids were looking out for the younger kids, making sure they had their food and that they were eating. If there was anything the little ones needed they took care of things. Some of the kids that no longer attend Cornerstone joined the crowd as if not a day has past since they last played with each other. A few of the kids brought friends from school and those new faces were accepted by everyone like old friends.
It got me to thinking about something my sister told me awhile back. She had just returned from Hawaii. She went to visit some of the cousins we grew up with in Guam. Most of them are already married and have kids. She said that when she does get married and have kids, she would like to move back to Hawaii and have the kids grow up around our cousin's kids. We were reminiscing of the time when we were kids growing up in Guam. We grew up surrounded by family. Our families lived within a bike ride of each other so it was not unusual for a crowd of "the cousins" to be roaming around the neighborhood like some gang, though back then the word gang meant a bunch of people. We numbered as few as four and as many as fifteen or twenty. I remember everytime we would all ride our bikes to the store or to the movies, the older cousins would split up riding in front and some in back to make sure none of the younger ones would be left behind or get separated from the group. My sister reminded me of a number of times we were "rescued" by anolder cousin watching out for us from a situation that would have been embarassing in the least, painful at its worst. She said that she would want a similar atmosphere for her kids and she sees that with our cousins' kids in Hawaii. I see what she's talking about, because I have seen our cousin's kids in action and it reminds me of how we were when we were kids.
Looking around the restaurant, I see how Allison, Bradley, Christopher, Natalie, Stevie and Traci look after, over and to the needs of the little ones like Mia, Brianna, Sara and Matthew. Each Sunday, I see Allison, Natalie and Traci take Brianna, Mia and now Kaitlyn under their "wings", Bradley, Brian, Christopher and Stevie running around each week, Brittany and Lindsay developing their friendship. I see Paul in Carson helping Natalie in Hacienda Heights with her Spanish online. Then there is Natalie helping everyone with anything that has to do with xangas, AIM-ing or anything internet...
When the time comes, I don't think I will need to consider moving to Hawaii when I start my family. I believe that the family I've found in Cornerstone can provide the love and nurturing any child(ren) I may have in the future. With uncles, aunts and older "cousins" he or she will have in the Cornerstone family, how can they NOT grow up loved and nurtured? No, I do not think I will be moving to Hawaii. Like I said a long time ago, Hawaii? It's a nice place to visit but I wouldn't want to live there.

Song of the Day: "Shower the People" by James Taylor

[kahit na ano]

Discovery has this National Health Challenge going on right now. They have a number of ways people can participate. I went to the Discovery store at the South Coast Plaza for the Weigh-In. I have until April 12th to lose as much weight as I can and Discovery is helping by providing a number of things to get me there. This is another in the "Angel, get of your butt" series, I hope it is more successful than the failures of the past. I have been trying to develop some good habits and get rid of a lot of real bad ones. Well, I have until April to see how effective I can make this.

My cousin Aurora called and asked me if I was watching the St. Louis/Carolina football game. The first thing that came to mind was, "What St. Louis/Carolina game?" I have not been watching/following this season's games at all since my team has been doing so poorly. I have been a Raider fan since the days of John Madden. I was finally able to watch my first Raider game in 1978, the season after winning Superbowl 11. It makes me think am I more of a Raider fan than a football fan? I still watch a few college games once in a while but there were seasons when i would watch every Raider game, but I don't remember watching other team's games.

Song of the Day: "Magic Carpet Ride" by Steppenwolf

[kahit na ano]

A woman was attacked by a Mountain Lion. After she was rescued, the body of a man was found nearby who officials think was killed by the same animal. I am glad the woman was rescued and I feel sorry for the man who was killed.

The thing that I find disturbing and worrying are the so-called experts that have been coming out with their "what you have to do when you see a mountain lion" advice. One of these "experts" was on one of the local news programs saying, "If you find yourself face to face with a mountain lion, you have to yell, 'I am a human, I am a human!'" WHAT!? What kind of advice is THAT? I don't care what a person yells at a mountain lion, if you look tasty, all it will understand is "I am food, I am food!"

You guys do what you want to do, but if I see a mountain lion and it is still deciding whether or not I am tasty enough for dinner, I am backing off and looking for anything I can use against it if and when it finally makes up its mind. A stick, a rock, gravel, anything! I will not waste energy trying to convince it in word it does not understand that I am not a rabbit.

Song of the Day: "An Innocent Man" by Billy Joel

[kahit na ano]

Pastor Donald is in town! It is so nice to see him again. He is definitely on that list of "people I get excited at the prospect of seeing" list (Dec. 30, 2003 post). A big group from church had dinner with him tonight at the Loft in Lakewood. There's something to be said when people get together after a length of time apart and start up as if it was the next day instead of years since last they sat together. It says something about the type of relationship and the strength of the relationship. I was so happy when I heard that Donald was going to be in town.
I cannot say enough of how much Donald and his entire family mean to me. I met them at a time in my life that was very unsure. Unsure about everything. Where my place was, what my place was in this world and how I was going to get there. I had a lot to figure and plan out. Thankfully, I was able to figure out a lot of things and I truly believe I am going in the right direction. I would like to think that no matter what I was going to get to where I am at now, but in all honesty, if it weren't for Donald and his family (and a lot of other beautiful people) it would have definitely been later not sooner (or now). When he and his family left for Chicago, my consolation was all the other people at Cornerstone that he did not take with them.

Song of the Day: "Blue Collar Man" by Styx

[kahit na ano]

Anyone remember this?

Rockin' and rollin'. splishin' and a-splashin',
Over the horizon, what can it be?
Looks like it's going to be a free country.

The pilgrims sailed the sea
To find a place to call their own.
In their ship, Mayflower,
They hoped to find a better home.
They finally knocked
On Plymouth Rock
And someone said, "We're there."
It may not look like home
But at this point I don't care....


I saw it on one of the oldies channel on cable, while surfing. It brought back some memories.

Song of the Day: "Gangsta' Nation" by Westside Connection

[kahit na ano]

Lists. Everybody has lists. For the most part, lists of things to do ______.
- today
- tomorrow
- for him, her or them.
- before I get married.
- before I graduate.
- for school, church, my family.
- before I die.

I have a bunch of lists too. I have sooooo many lists I have a list of all my lists. For now, it is going to be about my list of things to do before I die list. I have knocked out a lot of things off the list, though every once in a while I add something else to it. I must admit most of the things on this list are pretty ho-hum, but there are a few things on there that are heroic! Ok, not so much heroic, but cool and others ballsy. Anyway, here are some of the stuff I've been able to knock off the list.
- Play a musical instrument on a secluded lake.
- Surf.
- Stand in a spot so secluded that I have no clue as to where anything in the world is and not care.
- Overcome a fear (repeat when possible).
- Survive a life or death situation, accidents do not count (definitely repeat when possible).

There are a few more that I have been able to cross off and there are even more that have yet to be crossed off. This year I hope to cross off at least two... we'll see.

Song of the Day: "2112" by Rush

[kahit na ano]

I heard this song the other day and it has been killing me. I do not know the name of the song or who sang it. I got home yesterday afternoon and I was taking it easy channel surfing. I got to a channel where there was a man singing a tune I vaguely recognize, so I stopped. It was a nice old tune, but before any of the words could register, the scene cut to a bus stop where one of the "stars" of the movie is coming off the bus and the music fades... argh!
So I find out the name of the movie (Duets) and I wait until the end of the movie for the credits to roll. I even set up the VCR to record it because I know that the musical credits either roll too fast or are all bunched up in two columns. Either one requires a person to be a speed reader. So, what happens? Network TV happens. Not only do they crank up the speed on the entire credits, but they shrink the credits in order to run a commercial!!! What the heck is up with that?!!!
I figure ok, no problem. I gotz skills, I can figure things out. I do a little research and I have it narrowed down to 3 songs. The listing for the soundtrack was a little help, but only a little. Hmmm... I think I spent a couple of hours on this thing.

See how dangerous a little obsession can do? I guess, I'm going to have to rent the movie. The thing is... it's not a movie I would normally rent. So this is what's going to happen. I am going to rent this movie, take it home, fast forward it to the song and see if I can get the title or hear enough to recognize the tune or fast forward to the credits and play it super slo-mo, rewind it (maybe), then finally return it. All this is going to take maybe an hour with travelling time. This blows.

Song of the Day: "Jenny (867-5309)" by Tommy Tutone

[kahit na ano]

I wrote this a long time ago.

A Moment's Vision

It's that magical moment between
night and day.
The sun, with it's crown not quite
below the horizon,
and the darkness of the night has yet to fill the sky.
I stand on a cliff looking down on the world
and I see clouds that aspire to reach my height,
I see the outline of an eagle soaring below,
adding to the majesty of my vision.
Further below, I hear the mighty ocean crashing on the shore,
each wave getting louder as if in protest
of the earth's obstruction.

Suddenly,
I realize I'm not alone.
Beginning their twilight's vigil,
the stars slowly fill the sky,
each adding to the splendor of their dance.
And just as I captured the moment,
it slips from my grasp.
Though I regret it not.
For life is full of such moments.
One need just realize
them...

I wrote this a long time ago, in fact I believe it was late 1986, though I can't be too sure. I was down in Laguna Beach looking out into the ocean one afternoon. I used to go down there to "recharge my batteries" or to clear my head. I was just looking out into the ocean waiting for the sun to set and before I knew it I was looking at the reflection of the moon on the ocean. I tried to picture just when the day ended and the night began. I couldn't. So I came back the next day to see if I can capture that moment and missed it again. I came back again the next day and the day after that, but I just kept missing it. That last day, a seagull flew between these big rocks in the water just as a wave sprayed over them. I thought that was so cool. It was then that I realized what a bozo I was in trying to capture something that was going to be there everyday. So there...

Song of the Day: "Day By Day" by Najee

[kahit na ano]

A list. A short incomplete list, because a complete list would be long and impossible.
I do not understand ...

- People who are studying to become teachers, yet settle for mediocrity in their own education.
- People who drive recklessly with kids in the car, heck people who drive recklessly period.
- People who work zealously to send food and aid to starving people across the ocean, when there are people starving in their same city.

Song of the Day: "Can't Stop It But I'm Gonna Try" by Cheap Trick

[kahit na ano]

I was listening to the radio on the way home and the announcer was reading off some new year resolutions that some of their listeners sent in or called in to the station. For the most part a lot of them were of the "I'm going to lose weight" or "I'll be nicer to my sister" type. There were a few that were pretty cool like using the car horn only for
emergencies and especially not for reasons of impatience. Of course there were more than enough of the "heart-warming, feel good" resolutions like "I will spend more time with my family and less time at work".
There was one resolution that caught my ear. The person prefaced the resolution by using a term from an African adage (I could not get the phrase) which roughly translated, tells people to become the person that God has given you the potential to become.
I thought that was such a powerful message. I think back to times when I have halted any progress towards self improvement, personal involvements or the improvement of the world within my sphere of influence by settling for "good enough". Why did I settle? Why do I settle? I wonder if it was because I was just lazy or I just didn't want to bother? Either way, it is a lame reason. It is not limited to one's actions either because it can also apply to one's thoughts, reasoning and attitude.
I wish that person all the strength necessary to carry out such resolution. I pray for the same strength in me because it has also become my resolution.

Song of the Day: "Try a Little Tenderness" by Otis Redding

[kahit na ano]

One of my New Year's Resolutions is to put myself "out there" again in the dating scene and I must admit I find the prospect a little exciting and a lot frightening. But lately, I've been hearing women... and I mean a lot of women ask, "How come there aren't any DECENT men OUT THERE?" What is that all about?
Now, as one of the men "out there" how am I supposed to react to something like that? What exactly does that imply? Are we, all the men, not decent? Do we not meet some sort of standard? Where and what are these standards? Is there a book or something where a bunch of minimums are written down so we as men can work towards? What exactly does DECENT mean anyway?
Decent? I would like to think I am decent. I would like to think I am excellent but then again, don't we all? Anyway, whose perceptions are we going by? As much as I dislike the label, I am a nice guy. It usually takes a WHOLE LOT to make me mad. I can think of only a handful of people who have actually seen me fuming mad.
But that's enough about me... Let's get back to the women... I've ALWAYS wanted to say that... hmmm... I guess I still haven't. So, where are these women looking that they can't find "any DECENT men" and by decent men I really mean, decent MAN... and by decent man I really mean... here it comes... ME! Are all the men they are finding a bunch of dogs? Players? Or whatever they call them these days? What are they looking at, that the un-DECENT men are the only ones being evaluated? Because if this goes on any longer, it will really mess it up for the "few" remaining decent guys out there... and by decent guys I really mean decent GUY... and by decent guy I really mean... ok ok
There is a similar statement that guys say though it isn't as all encompassing. It goes something like this, "Why is it that all the good ones are taken, married or not interested?" Hmmm... I guess that would partly explain the women's exasperation about no decent men. The guys who are saying the "not interested" part ARE the un-DECENT ones. I'm going to have to rethink this...

Song of the Day: "Got To Begin Again" by Billy Joel

[kahit na ano]